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I’m Here, I’m Okay and I Miss You!

Finally, I am back online!  We still have no power at our home so hubby and I, along with our pups had to “relocate” to a temporary place further out.  But, we are safe.  We are healthy and we are very fortunate in that we can do this.

I LOVE this coconut. Wished I’d picked it up, it’s very symbolic to me.

(Here’s that coconut again that we found on the beach before Sandy hit from my last post — I really like that tough coconut — don’t you?  It has braved a helluva storm).

Our power went out the day of Hurricane Sandy — she was a bee-otch, y’all and let me tell you, the next time the weather-gasmic people tell us to leave, we will leave.  We had battened down the hatches and were watching a Sopranos episode on a previously-charged 7” screen of a portable DVD player when we heard pops going off outside.  The wind was screaming and we got up to look outside our front door.  Water was sluicing down the streets and it looked like a river.  It was coming up to our front door and our back door.

I didn’t know how much I would suck (panic-wise) in these situations, but I learned that about myself.  Not very well — I thought that dunes were flattened and that was the ocean coming up, about to take us away.  I was terrified.  Hubby stayed calm.  This raging of wind and rain went on for hours and we’d keep a check outside to make sure we weren’t going to be washed away.  But, once you’re there, you’re there.  It was the bay that came up to meet some of the ocean.  We were protected by dunes.  Those just down the street from us were not so lucky.  The next day, people came out to explore the wreckage.  The town in which I have ridden my bike, had lunch, talked to merchants — didn’t fare so well.  I still haven’t processed it, I don’t think.  But I know these people will come back — strong.

I have no pictures because I didn’t want to take those pics of others losing things and I’m sure you seen enough of the images anyway.  Cars were nestled against each other — ruined, they had bobbled, hit each other and floated down the streets.  Pieces of boardwalk had floated blocks and landed in parking lots.  We saw boats that had floated out of marinas and were in the middle of the road, then pushed over into parking lots.  We had no cell service, no way during the storm in which to call even if there was an emergency.  There’s still no cell service, as far as I know, where we were.

Long gas lines.  Police, national guard and FEMA people everywhere.  The Red Cross set up in a grocery store parking lot.   One night, a helicopter hovered low over our neighborhood casting spotlights onto everyone’s houses, down the streets.  We’d hear rumors of looting.

But the good of people and strangers far outweighed the “bad.”

Some people have lost everything.  We still have our possessions which I’m glad — but something like this changes you.  I don’t even know how yet.  I feel grateful that we’ve not experienced the loss that others have.  Then I feel badly because I feel grateful.  I feel guilty.  Then I’ll become depressed or panicked and then feel bad about that.  I know I’m not making sense.  What I’m saying is this:  I’m okay and everything that matters to me is okay.

Hubby and I would go out during the day to places that had power and we’d talk to people in the same situation as us — some who had it far worse, they’d lost everything — and it reinforced my belief in the goodness and kindness of people.  I’ll be writing more about this in future posts.

Thanks to all of you who personally emailed me — you have no idea how much that meant to me  – no idea.  I’d cry sometimes when I’d see your concern — thank you, thank you, thank you.   Sometimes email would come through on my phone and I couldn’t reply back, the service would die.  Honie, Audra, Grippy, Sandee, Weebs, Margarita, Mike, Le Clown, Sue, Cathy…and some of you left messages on some of my posts — thank you, thank you.  Did I miss anyone?  If I did, I’m so sorry — but thank you.

I’ve missed you so much and I’ve got some catching up to do on all your blogs, now that we’re settled here for awhile.   Whatever tomorrow brings, it brings.

I am so grateful for you.  I promise my posts will be more upbeat in the coming days.

Much, much, much love to you, my dear, wonderful, beautiful friends.

About Brigitte



83 thoughts on “I’m Here, I’m Okay and I Miss You!

  1. Brigitte, it is wonderful to hear you are safe. You have been sorely missed since the storm, and we have all hoped you and others are okay.

    I think the conflicting emotions you feel are completely normal for what you’ve gone through. I’ve heard the survivors of other disasters express very similar feelings. So don’t worry if your next posts aren’t upbeat. If you need to let other emotions flow, we’ll understand. You’ve got a lot of friendly shoulders to lean on with readers like me.

    So take care of yourself and know that we are all relieved to hear from you!

    Posted by jmmcdowell | November 8, 2012, 11:50 am
    • JM, I am sorry if I missed you….I don’t even know if I got all my messages, but thank you so much, my friend. I am overwhelmed at the friendly shoulders – yours included – that have asked about me. thank you. xxoo

      Posted by Brigitte | November 8, 2012, 11:54 am
  2. Glad to hear you are safe – Take Care and Be Safe:)

    Posted by cravesadventure | November 8, 2012, 11:57 am
  3. I’m so glad you’re back and safe. I was thinking of you this morning – along with Madame Weebles (who was able to post yesterday so I knew she was faring well). Stay well – you havea lot to work thru in your mind and world. The ones you love are safe – that is what counts. I look forward to your future posts. If you need anything – just ask –

    Posted by Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher | November 8, 2012, 11:59 am
  4. All is right with the world again. So so so glad to see you back to the banter. You know what you’re feeling, all of those emotions, you’ll process through them and everyone, your friends now plus those who meet you in the future are the fortunate ones because this kind of event most definitely makes a person stronger. Stronger for having come through it, but also stronger for allowing others to lend a helping hand or a word of encouragement. It means a great deal to people to be a support. It really does give a person confidence to know they are being a help to someone else. So, thanks Brigitte for boosting our confidence!

    Posted by Honie Briggs | November 8, 2012, 12:09 pm
    • Honie, you are so nice. Thank you — it is you and these other wonderful people who have boosted my confidence. We didn’t experience ruin the way some have, but the people that we have talked to and who given support — to the towns that had power and let those of us who didn’t come in, rest and plug things in so we could have power, it’s astonishing, the way people are so kind and wonderful. Thank you for your continuing emails — you are so wonderful. much love. xxoo

      Posted by Brigitte | November 8, 2012, 12:14 pm
  5. B– you don’t have to be upbeat. You have been traumatized. I had no idea you lived so close to the water. You are safe and out of harm’s way, let the rest just happen as it happens. Glad you are back and thank you for bearing witness to all of this to those of us so far away. xoxox

    Posted by Maggie O'C | November 8, 2012, 12:09 pm
  6. Brigitte, you’ve been missed! I’ve been thinking about you non-stop since Sandy hit. The healing will take time, I think. Sending positive thoughts your way. . .T.

    Posted by Theadora | November 8, 2012, 12:09 pm
  7. You had me worried Brigitte! Glad everything is (relatively) okay, and you two are safe.

    Posted by mabukach | November 8, 2012, 12:12 pm
  8. Oh, Brigitte! I’m so happy you’re ok. What an ordeal you’ve been through. I’m relieved you’re safe. I was thinking about you and was worried for you. I don’t think you need to feel like you need to be upbeat. I think you should do what you feel you need to do, and you must have so much to process. I’m here for you and I wish you well.

    Posted by The Bumble Files | November 8, 2012, 12:15 pm
  9. Holy smokes! Gosh, what you have been through. I’m glad you are safe and hope life returns to normal soon for you and your community.

    Posted by robincoyle | November 8, 2012, 12:35 pm
  10. So glad you are okay–you are such a bright ray of sunshine that you were so missed. I don’t know what else to say–but I have been worried about you–I was one of those who left messages on some of your posts–have not figured out how to email you (I am a little dim-witted). You and Madame Weebles are back–all is right with the world.

    Posted by on thehomefrontandbeyond | November 8, 2012, 12:44 pm
  11. How my heart breaks to hear of such distress and loss. You make total sense as you’re processing a disaster and all that it means. I’m sure you’re right, it will take a bit of time to figure out what it all means to you. God bless you and your family and many prayers to all who are suffering. SO happy to have you back!

    Posted by michelleatplay | November 8, 2012, 12:46 pm
    • Hi Michelle, I am okay! Promise and thank you so much for your kind thoughts and words. Thank you for the prayers and well wishes, they are appreciated — please continue to do so for those not as fortunate as me. It will take time for those who lost everything, but things will get right again and I’m glad to be back. xxoo

      Posted by Brigitte | November 8, 2012, 1:11 pm
  12. Brig, I have been thinking about you, so very glad you are safe. I am sure it will be hard to come to terms with all the destruction and the randomness of it all in the days ahead. It is just like you to see the good and light in the aftermath though, and I think that is the kind of spirit that will carry you through.

    Posted by rollergiraffe | November 8, 2012, 12:50 pm
    • Hey RG, thank you. I am safe. Life is good. You’ve put it exactly right — the randomness…that’s it. I am so fortunate and so grateful. Trust me, there are those who’ve gone through much worse and they have a light as well. I am amazed at the strength and spirit of human beings. So much good out there. So many good people. Thank you, RG.

      Posted by Brigitte | November 8, 2012, 1:14 pm
  13. Thank you for this post, I am glad that you guys are safe. We have been through a few floods out here in CA and the difficult part for us was that every time we had a heavy rain afterwards those anxious feelings bubbled to the surface once more. As time passed, they eased up. Talking to your neighbors and helping others is beneficial to everyone’s piece of mind and sense of community. Good luck and God Bless.

    Posted by Allan G. Smorra | November 8, 2012, 1:19 pm
  14. So glad you, your husband, and your home are okay.

    Posted by notedinnashville | November 8, 2012, 1:34 pm
  15. Good to hear from you and very glad that you’re safe. It sounds like you’ve had it quite rough, but you’re doing what it takes to get through it. Seeing the after effects of Sandy’s rage in your own community must be very painful. There was minimal damage by me in Upper Manhattan, and I know I just got very lucky — this time.

    Posted by lameadventures | November 8, 2012, 1:47 pm
    • Hi V, thank you. It was rough, kind of scary and it wasn’t pleasant having no power for over a week, but things are good and will only get better. Glad you were okay. I have a friend who works in Manhattan and he said parts of it look as if nothing happened! So glad you and yours are safe and warm. Thank you for stopping by.

      Posted by Brigitte | November 8, 2012, 5:04 pm
  16. i’m really glad to hear you’re all in one piece, Brig. You’ve been missed. Be well, my friend.

    Posted by The Waiting | November 8, 2012, 2:51 pm
  17. WHASSUP, B?????? I’m so glad to see your post. I know we emailed earlier but I’m glad to see you back here. I know you’ve endured an awful lot—yeah, it could have been worse, but it still sucks. Here’s hoping that normalcy is restored to you soon.

    Posted by Madame Weebles | November 8, 2012, 3:35 pm
  18. So glad to hear you’re safe. you’ll be fine. helping out in the neighbourhood as I imagine you, maybe, to give out, just because it feels good when you’re ok, to be able to give out a bit to those a little (or a lot) less ok than yourself. and take care, now. everything should be fine. Have another walk by the beach, you never know what you’re going to find there, surely peace of mind at some point; even after raging, the ocean still has a soothing effect.
    Thinking of you again.
    Take care!

    Posted by Les Petits Pas de Juls | November 8, 2012, 3:46 pm
  19. So glad you’re okay. Here I thought you lived in California. Not sure what I was thinking, because I now remember a post you did on New York. Well, I’m sorry you’ve had to go through this. How horrible to witness and experience.

    Posted by Carrie Rubin | November 8, 2012, 4:05 pm
  20. I understand about not taking the photos…and about your fear!

    Posted by bodhisattvaintraining | November 8, 2012, 4:44 pm
  21. Glad you are okay! Stay safe!

    Posted by JackieP | November 8, 2012, 5:07 pm
  22. So glad to hear you are alright. Having watched all the damage that storm has caused and how cold it is there with no power makes our summers here at 115 degrees seem like a cake walk. I know I whine all the time about the heat but being from Montana I know about cold weather. I can’t imagine all that people are having to deal with right now with no power, let alone all the destruction Sandy left in its path. Makes one humble indeed

    Posted by Debra Callaghan | November 8, 2012, 5:07 pm
  23. i am so glad you posted Brigitte. I have been thinking of you and now with this Nor’easter– ugh. Awful simply awful weather and circumstances!
    It does my heart good to see your post.
    Be well and stay positive.

    Posted by unfetteredbs | November 8, 2012, 5:15 pm
  24. Welcome back brigitte. I’m so glad that you and your family are safe. Sorry you had to leave your home, but thankfully it is only temporary. My heart and prayers go out to all those living along the east coast.

    Posted by thehealthywarrior | November 8, 2012, 5:47 pm
  25. Glad you are okay. Would have been terrified if I had seen all that water coming towards me. Take care.

    Posted by J.D. Gallagher | November 8, 2012, 6:06 pm
  26. Very glad to hear from you and know you made it through this bad ordeal better than most. Will continue to pray for those less fortunate and darn, so good to see you here 🙂

    Posted by free penny press | November 8, 2012, 6:56 pm
  27. Brigitte, I’m so happy to hear you’re okay. I figured you’d be busy in the aftermath just trying to settle back down to a somewhat normal life but nevertheless, you were greatly missed. As you said, so many others were not so lucky but most people are adopting an attitude of understanding and gratitude that is really moving to see. So glad to see you back. I’m sending positive thoughts and energy to the East Coast!

    Posted by lillianccc | November 8, 2012, 9:00 pm
  28. Ah, Brigitte, what a relief, dear friend, to know you and hubby are safe! Baby steps, dear one. Baby steps! xoxoM

    Posted by Margarita | November 8, 2012, 9:35 pm
  29. Glad you are back! Take good care. Thank you for sharing your experience.

    Posted by britta326 | November 8, 2012, 10:15 pm
  30. Sending you virtual supportive hugs! Glad you are back but more importantly, that you and yours are safe. Be well.

    Posted by exceedingspeed | November 8, 2012, 10:16 pm
  31. Sending you all good wishes from Victoria, Brigitte. I’m so happy to hear that you are okay. It sounds like you have been through a horrifying ordeal. Hang in there, my friend!

    Posted by Deliberately Delicious | November 8, 2012, 10:23 pm
  32. So glad you are okay. Powerful story and words and reality. Much to be thankful for, you said it so well about being overwhelmed and thankful and guilty. You are amazing, and thanks for the word!!!

    Posted by isawbobdylaninaspeedo | November 8, 2012, 10:24 pm
  33. You have been missed and thought about my dear. I’ll continue to hold you in my heart. Tough days behind you, tough days ahead. Just keep swimming, just keep swimming… And when life hands you coconuts, well Buffett would say to break out the rum and make a bra from the shells.

    Posted by runningonsober | November 8, 2012, 10:51 pm
  34. Brigitte,
    I’ve been at work all day, but I was so happy to read your post at lunch and know that you’re okay. You have so been in my thought’s, prayers, energy healings – whatever you want to call it. Holding you up with good thoughts and knowing you were safe. Write about it as you feel you can, I think it helps and you’re such a great writer, you’ll be able the heal quickly as you do. It’s great to have you back in the fold.

    Posted by Cathy Ulrich | November 8, 2012, 10:56 pm
  35. I’m so glad you’re safe honey (((((hugs)))))


    Posted by Vikki (The View Outside) | November 9, 2012, 7:13 am
  36. Hi, Brig!

    I don’t think anyone will fault you for taking care of business and real life. My heart continues to ache for everyone in New York and New Jersey… most especially for me, the folks on Long Island, because I have so many friends and family members there and many are deeply affected.
    I pray to God and the universe to heal the hearts of those impacted financially, physically and emotionally.

    All my love and concern,

    Posted by Swimming In The Mud | November 10, 2012, 1:58 pm
  37. SO glad you are okay, so sorry to hear about your little town–I hope it does, along with the rest of the area, come back soon and stronger than ever.

    Next time, if there happens to be a next time, leave. Please. X

    Posted by Addie | November 10, 2012, 3:01 pm
  38. Relieved to hear you are safe Brigitte. I cannot imagine what it must have been like for you. Take care. Teresa x

    Posted by floatingwiththebreeze | November 10, 2012, 5:21 pm
  39. I’m so happy you’re okay! Sorry to hear about those around you. I understand why you say you feel guilty, but you have no reason to. You went through something terrible too, and it’s okay to have feelings about that.

    Stay safe!

    Posted by Jen and Tonic | November 11, 2012, 6:53 pm
  40. I think this post is already pretty upbeat, considering what you’ve gone through. I’ve heard stories of flippant hipsters playing frisbee while Sandy raged, romantic tales of communities huddling together by candle light. And then I’ve heard stories of gun toting New Yorkers hell bent on fuel. That Home Depot was a scary place. Depending on what each person lived through, it affected their view on the fellow man. I think it’s great you are able to weigh out the good, the bad, the fair and unfair. All the best in the days, weeks, ahead to you and your town.

    Posted by Bitter en Zoet | November 12, 2012, 4:17 am
  41. Glad you made it out okay, Brigitte! It’s funny the things that make us afraid (although a monster hurricane is not a silly or irrational thing to fear when it’s happening). Sometimes I will surprise myself by being brave in a scary situation, and then other times I embarrass myself by turning into a six-year-old girl when a bee flies into my office.

    Posted by Smaktakula | November 15, 2012, 12:49 pm
  42. Sorry, I’ve been off the radar for a few weeks. I’m so glad to read that you’re all right, but feel for the terror you went through during the storm. Storms are awful and humble you more than almost anything. Look forward to hearing more of your posts of the aftermath and rebuilding.

    Posted by char | November 18, 2012, 6:28 pm
  43. Hey Honie! Why am I just now getting this?? Hope you are wonderful and miss you.

    Posted by Brigitte | January 18, 2013, 5:48 pm


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